·

Father : Son, if you do well in exams I shall buy you a cycle.
Son : Thanks Papa & what if I fail ?

Father : I will buy you a cycle-rickshaw !!

· A salesman was demonstrating unbreakable combs in a department store. He was impressing the people who stopped by to look by putting the comb through all sorts of torture and stress. Finally to impress even the skeptics in the crowd, he bent the comb completely in half, and it snapped with a loud crack. Without missing a beat, he bravely held up both halves of the 'unbreakable' comb for everyone to see and said, "And this, ladies and gentlemen, is what an unbreakable comb looks like on the inside."

· An Office Secretary calls the Computer maintenance guy to fix her computer. After he had fixed the problem, the junior asistant who was standing by, asked about the problem. Maintenance guy replied it was due to this "ID 10 T" and they both laughed aloud.
Irked by this joke the Secretary went to her boss to know what "ID 10 T" meant.

He made her write down "IDIOT".

· The composition teacher asked the class to write about an unusual event that happened during the past week. Little Johnny got up and read his essay.
It began, "Our neighbour fell into the well last week..."
"My goodness!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he all right?"
"He must be," said the boy.
"He stopped yelling for help since yesterday."

· Four expectant fathers are in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room while their wives were in labor. The nurse comes in and tells the first man, "Congratulations, you’re the father of twins." "What a coincidence," the man exclaims. "I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team." The nurse returns a short while later and tells the second man, "You are the father of triplets." "Wow, what a coincidence," he replies. "I work for the 3M Corporation." When the nurse comes again, she tells the third man that his wife has given birth to quadruplets. "Another coincidence. I work for the Four Seasons Hotel." At this point, the fourth guy faints. When he comes to, the others ask what’s wrong. "What’s wrong? I work for Seven-Up."

· One train which was going peacefully on the rail tracks suddenly deviated from the tracks and went to the fields nearby and then came back on the tracks. The passengers were horrified.
At the next railway station the driver Tukkham was caught. He was questioned. He explained that there was a man standing on the tracks and he was not moving from there even after lots of honks, etc. The authorities questioned: "Tukkham are you mad! Just to save the life of one person you put the lives of so many passengers in danger!? You should have run over that person."
Tukkham said: "Exactly! That is what I also decided, but this idiot started running towards the field when the train came very close!"

· During a share market crash, lot of investors lost a fortune due to diving prices across the board. A small investor decides to visit a big daddy of the stock market and asks him, "Are you worried ?" Replies the big bull, "I sleep like a baby". Surprised he asks, "Really? Even with all the losses in your stock portfolio?" He replies, "Yes I sleep for a couple of hours, then wake up and cry for a couple of hours...."

· A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to inquire the route to his destination. Before he could utter a word, the driver screams. loses control over the car, nearly hits a truck, goes on to the footpath, and stops inches away from a shop window. For a second every thing goes quiet in the cab, then the driver turns his head and says, " Look mate, don't you ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me." The passanger apologises and says, "I didn't realise that a little tap on your shoulder would scare you so much." The driver replies, "Sorry, actually it's really not your fault. Today it's my first day as a cab driver. I h've been driving a funeral van for the last 20 years."

· A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large quantity of goods involving a great deal of money. The distributor noticed that previous bill hasn't been paid by the customer even after it is long overdue. The distributor left a voice mail for customer saying "We can't ship until you pay our last overdue bill." Next day the distributor receives a fax from the customer saying "Please cancel the order. We can't wait that long."

Go To JokeI Section